Just One Breath

An American girl in Scotland, figuring things out one step at a time



So over the past few years A LOT has changed, I will get into that later, but I wanted this year to be a little more about me. I have willingly and happily given so much so 2017 needs to be a little bit about finding what I want and need for myself now. It isn’t a selfish thing as I first felt it was, it is more about being the best version of myself that I can be.

So what does this coming year look like? That is a good question and an ever evolving one. It isn’t like “Let’s make New Years Resolutions.” It is about life changes that I have been working on but need to complete. I am going to put them all out there so that I have more than my “Team Me” to be held accountable too.

1) Health/Weight

Goal number 1… Achieve my health/weight goals. I am not talking about “I want a nice butt” although I do miss my bum so that would be a nice bonus, I am thinking bigger goals. Yes I have a weight goal but it isn’t a vanity weight goal it is an “I feel most comfortable at this size” goal. I have had my body rocked by 2 pregnancies and have bounced back pretty well but I am not where I want to be yet. I need to be as fit and healthy as I can be to carry on with my life from here forward. I have a huge health challenge coming up in the near future. I will be going on medication for my MS. I have not been on any DMD (disease modifying drugs) since my diagnosis in 2012. I have combatted MS with a healthy diet, exercise and pregnancy. Yes you read that right. Pregnancy has a huge bonus, besides a wonderful baby, it makes MS go dormant almost. Your immune system, that is wrecking your myelin, doesn’t want to kill the baby so it chills out a but. It is nice. I am choosing to go on medication for my family. I always say it is for my family even when people yell at me that it is for myself too but my family is my life and I would do anything for them so… this step it about them. It is about being there for them in the form of my best self.

2) Read more books

This goal ties in with goal number 5 and is a step toward getting rid of my brain fog. I have read 1 book since 2013. Yes, I know, I have read countless articles, cookbooks, blogs and other sources on how to not kill your baby, how to combat sleep regression, how to feed your baby, breastfeeding help, poop help, cloth nappies/diapers, baby wearing and craft ideas but I have not read any books for me. I have 6 books that I have started but only one that I managed to finish while sitting on the train platform waiting as my small person slept in her pram. So… goal number 2… finish 10 books or more in 2017.

3) Write blog

This is where you come in. I have had so many friends and readers ask when I will start writing again and I always say, “When I have time.” Well the time is now. I will make time to get writing done. It is cathartic for me and I love it. I almost always have a good cry during writing and that is good for me mentally and physically. I love to write and I love that I can make people feel happy, not alone or whatever it is that brings people back to reading the things that I write. So goal number 3… I will write.

4) Work on Marital/Friendship Relationships

This is probably one of the most important goals that I have. I feel like as a parent everything comes second to a child and that isn’t necessarily the way it should be but it is the way it is. I still will put my children before everything else but the neglect that I feel I have committed towards my amazing husband (who is making silly noises and playing with the baby as I type) and my friends will stop here. I will write emails, make phone calls, cuddle on the couch, make dates with them that we keep because marriages and friendships that are like that last. I don’t want fleeting friendships anymore, I want lasting ones. I will say, let’s do this again soon and make a date to do it not let 7 months pass before one of us does something about it.  So goal number 4… I will be a better partner and friend.

5) Take a course in something to either enrich myself or prepare for return to work

I want to go back to work eventually and I want to be prepared to do this. I have already learned that my Masters Degree is worth toilet paper over here so, I will get ready to do something else. I want to be a financial contributor to my family as well as a homemaker. I have been blessed to be able to be a Mom but I miss working. I have worked since I was 14 and it has been hard to not be able to help with bills. I want to earn money to ease the pressure on my husband as sole breadwinner. Having said that I truly am blessed that I have been able to be home but I feel totally out of the loop. I want to take a course that is relevant to the office environment I may find myself in. So goal number 5… I will take a course in something to further my knowledge or just to enhance my mind/spirit for a peaceful return to work.

It may all seem a tall order but I am hoping with the help of my Team Me, my friends, husband and healthcare providers I will achieve my goals and find my best self along the way. x heather




  1. I love you Heather, and it doesn’t matter how long we don’t talk or see each other I’ll always love you and you’ll always be my friend 😉

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